I don't want to lie to you anymore. To this day I’ve never watched a transgender-movie though almost everyone that learns my story tells me, “Oh, you should really watch the movie, The Danish Girl, as if I hadn’t already lived the pain. 

I am deep in the muck right now. My spouse of ten years started taking hormones just last week, and, though I knew it was coming, I am devastated. I have that hollow feeling you get when someone close to you has died. The path forward is not about fitting in to my spouse’s new-found life. It is about discerning who I am in relationship to the world around me….

This article isn’t about being a transgender partner. Not really. It’s about being on the bottom rung, in the hole, off the map, on a deserted island, alone and unheard for the first time in my white-gay-guy-privileged life and I’m hating it….

Just last week I put this necklace on for the first time. I cried for what seemed like days. I have no doubt that my transition would have made sense to my mother. My showing up as me would have answered all of the weird confusion between us.

Guinevere’s transition and our decision to divorce kicked up raging insecurities for me regarding where I was going to live, how I would support myself, and how many people would judge me for another failed marriage...

I saw a young girl, seven or eight years old, playing and rolling down a grassy hill. Her obvious joy and laughter were infectious and I started smiling. Her parents were watching her and they weren’t smiling.

SOFFA's emotional, mental, and devastating financial experiences must be understood, too if the true cost of suppressing a child’s gender is to be accurately assessed.

We are helplessly crying to ourselves one minute and nervously laughing at the absurdity of our situation the next.